Bikini Bloodbath (2006) - Horror Slasher Satire

Bikini Bloodbath (2006) - Bikini Bloodbath is a really low budget, slasher satire with some pretty bad acting, horrible gay football player jokes, a silly killer French Chef, and lots of boobies. So naturally it was great. No it wasn't but we wanted it to be great. It will be known in my head at least as the film Debbie Rochon dies in and her last words are "Beaver". The plot is simple, there is a killer on the loose looking to kill for killings sake. The Chef as he known is one really crazy french guy played for laughs by Robert Cosgrove Jr. He flits in and out of the picture making kills with really low budget practical effects. The local girls volleyball team is having a party this particular weekend at Jenny's (Leah Ford) house. The are all buxom babes not afraid to show a bit of skin. There is the obligatory shower scene and girls goofy off and picking on the outcast of the group Smelly Suzy (Sheri Lynn). Of course the women playing the teens are way too old and the dialog is awful but it is amusing that they can get through the scenes without cracking up laughing at the stupid tropes and cliches they are spilling across the film.
The movie bounces between the girls getting together at Jenny's, Smelly Suzy sitting at home by herself, and the football players party at another house. The main point of the girls scenes are to get them in as few clothes as possible and have them party and play games like Twister. The Suzy scenes are to show the lonely girl as she starts to worry about the killer being around. This is also played for comedy with the actress Sheri Lynn doing a fairly competent comedy turn. She manages to fall and knock herself out twice. The Football players party, you know they are football players because they all wear shirts that say "Football Player" on them, are all about gay jokes. We all know that the homosexuality and jocks go hand and hand job so this is played to the max. The two freshmen of the team come to realize with excruciating clarity that all the males at the party ore sort of acting gay with each other. These section of the film are so hard to watch. Every joke is obvious and ham handed. It was necessary to keep repeating that it was done for satire effect that someone didn't really think these jokes were funny. Or did they?
When the killer finally closes in on our main group there are poor decisions, lots of drinking, silly antics and unimpressive deaths. For this reviewer the scene where Sharon (Anna-Karin Eskilsson) heads out to get help and then is seen sitting in a taco joint eating a burrito is the best part of the whole movie. Now don't get me wrong, although as a reviewer this "film" is pretty awful but personally I love this crap. There is a duality here that I struggle with. I can't recommend this film to anyone. In fact if you watch it from reading this review don't blame me. On the other hand I loved that I watched it. I in fact would love to be in a movie like this. It is silly and fun but just not good. Sick I know but what can I say.
I loved the extras on the disc particularly the music by White Liger and Rebecca Nurse.
Rating (1.1) 5.0 and up are recommended

Blood Car (2007) - Horror Satire

Blood Car (2007) - The story of Blood Car is that in the near future Gas prices are over $40 a gallon so nobody drives. Archie Andrews (Mike Brune) works hard trying to come up with an alternative engine that be with a fuel made from wheat grass. Some of the character satire is that he is a vegan who tries to go through life not harming anyone. Archie is blind to the love of the wheat grass selling Lorraine (Anna Chlumsky) as he presses his single minded purpose seeking a solution to the energy crisis. When he accidentally cuts himself while working on his engine he discovers the solution fuel. Now a vegan in crisis can drain some of his own blood for fuel, but is this really a long term solution. In a field is the booth where he buys his wheat grass, across from it is the Meat shed, where Denise (Katie Rowlett) sells "Meat". She sees Archie driving his blood fueled car and suddenly he is very attractive to her. She comes on to him for a date to the drive in, humorous with people all sitting on blanket but no cars. His desire to have sex out weighs his vegan, harm nothing principles and soon he is killing people to feed the car the blood it needs to keep seeing Denise. Also there are government agents watching him, and their desire for his new car. This won't matter to the viewer though because this low budget satire is pretty poor and at this point in the film attention to the plot starts to fade. Will Archie choose the nerdy but pretty Lorraine over the shallow and slutty Denise? Will the Agents steal his invention? Will Archie be able to live with himself after leaving his principles behind? Good luck to those brave enough to go after this one.
Rating (1.9) 5.0 and up are recommended, On the Zombiegrrlz rating system I would Skip It!